April Fools!
I (drum roll please . . .) am the reigning April Fool’s Champion! Perhaps I shouldn’t be quite so proud of this accomplishment, but I am. It is a title I wear proudly, along with my crown, scepter and cape. I’ve even been known to hum, “We are the Champions” every year on April 1. [...]
Graduation
Mark and I have officially graduated. And to be perfectly honest, we feel a little cheated. We didn’t get a ceremony. We didn’t get the cap and gown, or even the little rolled up piece of paper with the ribbon tied around it. There were no parties. No big sheet cake with, “Congratulations, Graduate!” There [...]
Standardized Tests
My children – and about a zillion others – are preparing to take their yearly standardized tests. Call me strange, but I used to love those test days when I was a kid. After all, on those days, the teachers were extra nice to us. They didn’t want us to be stressed out. And on [...]
Mercy Me
I looked in the rearview mirror at the police car pulling into the street behind me. Oh, please God, don’t let him be coming after me. I turned. He turned. I pulled into the parking lot. He pulled into the parking lot. I parked. He pulled up behind me and turned on his lights. Oh, [...]
Getting Laid Off
My dear husband is doing what a lot of people are doing these days. He’s praying he doesn’t lose his job. Over the past several weeks, he has watched many of his dear friends and colleagues become victims of a poor economy. Our hearts break for them, even as we pray it doesn’t happen to [...]
Bubbling Over
Have you ever done something really dumb, even though you knew it was dumb when you did it? Well, I did. Last week, I had a dishwasher full of dirty dishes and an empty dish cabinet. The reason? I was out of my little dishwasher tablets. And I kept forgetting to go to the store [...]
Sick Days
During the last few weeks, we’ve had a lot of sick days around our house. As a matter of fact, we’ve had more sick days than well days. And because we are a loving family, and we like to share with each other, we just keep passing things back and forth. We’ve had it all. [...]
Be Mine
“Mom, can I have some chocolate? Pleeeeeeease?” I’ve been hearing this for weeks, now. “No. It’s not Valentine’s Day yet.” “Pretty please, Mom? I’ll share with you!” “Well . . . okay. Maybe just one box.” We have now completed three heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. And it’s not even Valentine’s Day yet. My favorite thing [...]
Hanging Up
I really admire telemarketers. After all, they put up with a lot. They are hard-working people, just trying to make a living, and what do they get for their efforts? People like me. Or worse, people like my dear husband. A typical evening at my house has at least one episode like this: RRRRRRRiiiiiiiing! Me: [...]
Under the Rainbow
I am so embarrassed. I’m not talking just a little bit of a blush, here. I may have to move to another town. Seriously. You see, I got a new vacuum cleaner a couple of weeks ago. Not just any vacuum cleaner, either. I got a Rainbow vacuum cleaner. Top of the line. Well, actually, [...]
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